Ageism

There was a time when I thought being 18 made me an adult, and I guess in the eyes of the law that is true. yet recently adulthood has crept up on me, leaving me mourning the simpler days. So if it is not age, what is being an adult all about? Responsibility is the first thing that comes to mind. As I enter my last semester of college I become fully aware that in six months I will be twenty thousand dollars in debt and most likely still searching for employment. Responsibility sucks. If leaving college is a marker into adulthood then the experiences gained along the way must factor somehow. So what have I experienced in college? All night dance parties, bingeing, reckless abandonment, and homework. Perhaps college is not really about maturation but more likely a passage of the frivolous toward a more sustainable lifestyle. That being said, there is a push to do more of the above in the last semester than ever before because as an accepted part of being a productive adult is not staying up all night drinking from plastic cups and hitting on slightly inebriated girls. So in this last stand of a youth well spent I find myself arguing my inner conscience over where the cash shall be dealt and the hours budgeted. How much time can I spend at the bar? Then again when else will I be in this situation where it is expected? I guess it boils down to what you believe responsibility is in your own life. If the word is a negative for you than by all means drink up, realizing, of course, that responsibility is what holds us all together. For me being responsibility does not have the negative connotations. Sure being responsible sucks sometimes but with the personal freedom being an adult brings there is a responsibility that balances hedonism with sanctity so society can function. With four months to go I do not expect to descend into depravity but I will not be the square in bed by eleven. Balance. It's what keeps us walking the tightrope that is life.